Things that are Bullshit

#10 – Blatantly Phallic Structures

bullshitblog — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 06:02:41 +0000

I mean honestly…

#9 – Numbering

bullshitblog — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 23:35:51 +0000

We are opposed to lists, sequences, order, ennumeration, ordinal numbers, footnotes, endnotes, counting (see above), putting in line from shortest to tallest, and all other forms of numbering.

#9 – Small Towels

bullshitblog — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 11:50:28 +0000

A towel is supposed to cover all of you. (This guy kind of gets it).

What the hell am I supposed to do with this??

Bullshit.

#8 – Hairspray

bullshitblog — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 04:33:03 +0000

It’s stinky. And destroys your hair. And the ozone. If you use hairspray, we at Things That Are Bullshit implore you to stop living as a relic of the 80s.

Not to mention… Sarah Palin. Bullshit.

#7 – Blisters

bullshitblog — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 08:27:59 +0000

You’re just walking around minding your own business, trying to save the environment and all, and look what you get. A blister. Thank you, now you can’t walk, and you make carbon footprints instead. That’s just bullshit.

#6 – Textbooks

bullshitblog — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 13:37:09 +0000

too heavy, too expensive. from djfoobarmatt's flickr photostream

A racket run by dying companies that hate students, learning and your freedom. Usually heavy. Professors paid nothing for their work constructing authoritative knowledge for the unwashed masses. Bullshit.

#6 – The Confederacy

bullshitblog — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 08:33:16 +0000

The Confederacy was about defending slavery…

Yes it was about being rebellious, but the rebellion was against people who told them not to enslave folks. That is just bullshit.

#5 – Euphemism

bullshitblog — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 08:00:14 +0000

Clearly bull-honky. from beekr's flickr photostream

Almost by definition bullshit. Mostly because it’s a product of the bizarre policing of language that is censorship, but also because politeness is boring. I encourage all readers of this blog to take a moment and stop using euphemism, but rather go out and offend.

#4 – Wall Street

bullshitblog — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 12:00:00 +0000

The smell leaps off the page. from othermore (other)'s flickr

Look, I have no idea what has happened to the economy in the last few months, I just know it fucking sucks. And I’m pretty sure people who work on this street are responsible. Not only that, most everyone who works there is really really boring. Thus, Bullshit.

#3 – The Kyoto Protocol

bullshitblog — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 14:12:53 +0000

Walked all over. from Mark Robert Wilson's flickr.

Seriously. Ineffective, even as an empty gesture. It requires US compliance to mean anything, and the Americans just love their pollution too much. Plus: Pay to pollute? 5% reduction in CO2 vs. 1990? Srsly, it’s bullshit.